Yesterday.

_Leona Lewis.

Hihi, so in the past week I haven't updated, I feel like so much has happened. Well not literally but like emotionally and mentally for me. Anyway, spirit week was fun. I got to ride a firetruck and experience my first, legit football game. We won our homecoming game against Palisades 55-7! That was awesome. The homecoming dance wasn't as great as I expected it to be but it wasn't that bad either. We had a special guest performance by California Swag District and that was cool. Couldn't make it to the after party but that's alright. Things are getting slowly getting better with the gparents and I'm feeling alright.

I'm slowly slipping away from my family, my friends..this thing called my life. And I'm sure it's my fault all this is happening to me. I need to set my priorities straight and stop getting off track. Fucking pissing me off, man.

I'd like to note that some people should really see past the bullshit they're putting up with. Because sometimes, you're blinded by the things you want and you don't realize what you need and forget about what you deserve.

I thought I made myself pretty clear but I guess not.

I don't know if it's something I should go through with. What would you think of me? But then again, why should I care about what other people think of me? At the same time, I could lose my friends. The ultimate question is, will it be worth it? MEH. I think I'm a bad friend and a horrible person, please agree with me. :/ Does it mean something if I'm not able to tell certain people about certain things but there are certain people I can just share these certain things with no problem? I'm the worst person in the world, omfg.

I'm kinda excited for Thanksgiving. Hopefully, the family will get together this year and spend the day together.

I should do my homework. Goodnight!

xoxo.

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Fuck this shit. I'm tired of people always saying it's my fault. Okay, it's my fault. I don't need to hear it over and over again, consecutively. Maybe I feel bad as it already is. It's really not that necessary. I don't need you to constantly remind me that I'm the dumb one who fucks everything up. Why are you friends with a person who's always screwing up? Hm? Every asked yourself that question? I bet not. So if you're real, then prove it and I'll love you for it. If not, why are you still in my life?